LEV523 It was taught in the school of R. Yishmael: Tale-bearing and slander are one and the same [Why, then, is the second denominated by the first?] R. Nechemiah taught: [to teach that] one should not be as a merchant ["rochel" (similar to "rechiluth" - tale-bearing)], who "purveys" the words of one to another (Yerushalmi Peah 1:1)

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LEV541 Who is considered a talebearer? He who loads himself with talk and goes from one person to another, saying: "This and this is what such and such said. Thus and thus have I heard about such and such." Even though what he says is true, he thereby destroys the world. We have been exhorted against this [this verse]: "Do not be a talebearer among your people." What is talebearing? Revealing to one's friend things that were said of him in secret. And we learned (Sanhedrin 31a): "How do we know that a judge emerging from a trial should not say: 'I ruled for non-liability and my colleagues for liability. What can I do if they are in the majority?' In this connection, it is written: 'Do not be a talebearer among your people,' and (Mishlei 11:13): 'One who reveals a secret is a talebearer.'" Guard yourself greatly against slander, for through it you shame yourself. All who void others are themselves unfit. They cannot speak well of others and tend to brand them with their own faults (Kiddushin 70a); the fact that they utter it with her mouths stems from the fact that it is always in their consciousness.

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LEV542 This applies not only to brothers, for it is clear that one must love one's wife also and show affection for her--as it is written in the Talmud, "One who loves his wife as himself… [is blessed]." Yebamot 72b See also what our master and teacher Meir Ben Baruch of Rothenburg wrote in his collective responsa, "As for one who beats his wife, I have learned that we deal with him more harshly than with one who beats his neighbor. For he is not obligated to honor the neighbor, but he is obligated to honor his wife." [Collected Responsa 81:30.] There is also the prohibition against casting the evil eye on his wife, especially so as to cause her to die.… Hayyim Palaggi, Responsa Hikkeke Lev

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LEV532 See [[DEUT1236]] Deuteronomy 23:10 anything SPERO 138

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LEV544 See [[EXOD796]] Exodus 23:4 enemy COHON 213

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LEV546 See [[LEV176]] Leviticus 16:16 sins GATES 235

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LEV545 One must take great care not to put anyone to shame, for our Sages have said (Bava Metzia 59a): "One who whitens his friend's face [i.e., puts him to shame] in public has no share in the World-to-Come." The "whitening of the face" is the "dust" [i.e., a subtle form] of murder, the red [blood] leaving and the white [pallor] following (ibid. 58b). Furthermore, the pain of "whiteness" [humiliation] is more bitter than death, for which reason they said that one should rather fling himself into a fiery furnace than humiliate someone in public. They derive this from the example of Tamar, who allowed herself to be led out to be burned to death rather than humiliate Yehuda. And even where reproof is called for, the Torah writes [this verse]: "You shall surely reprove your friend, but do not bear sin because of him." How should one reprove his friend? In the beginning, in private and gently; but if in the beginning he rebukes him in public and humiliate him, he sins thereby (Arachin 16b). How much more so does one who humiliates his friend where reprove is not appropriate, for the destruction of Jerusalem resulted from the humiliation of Bar Kamtza (Gittin 55b-56a). Therefore, one must take great care not to do anything which may cause shame to anyone in the world

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LEV547 "You must not hate your brother in your heart" [this verse]. We have been admonished herein to remove the trait of hatred from within ourselves. This trait is the cause of many iniquities, and leads to many corrupt activities -- such as lashon hara (See the First Gate, note 26), which equals certain sins that require the death penalty, as we will explain (See paragraph 201); seeking [another's] evil; rejoicing over another's misfortune; causing harm to others; causing ill will; revenge; and bearing a grudge -- and to the loss of much good from the soul, as will be explained in The Gate of Hatred (See the First Gate, note 97). See how far the punishment of hatred extended, for our Sages, z"l, said (Yoma 9b), "Why was the second Beis HaMikdash destroyed, [even though the people] engaged in Torah study and good deeds? Because of the baseless hatred that existed between them."

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LEV556 It is far better and more positive to let the anger out rather than to harbor it inside and let it seethe and fester. Thus, a Jew is not permitted to hate a person in his heart, but should confront the person in as nice and non-angry fashion as possible, as discussed above [this verse]. Finally, Maimonides, who was careful and exacting in every word he wrote, does write that sometimes- if the issue is a very grave and large one-it is proper to get angry, but only once in a while, so that this emotion never becomes habitual.

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LEV569 There are many sources pointing out the strong antagonism of Judaism to the emotion of hatred. These sources flow from the Torah, the Tanach, the Talmud, and Midrash. The Torah specifically states [this verse] that one may not hate a brother (fellow Jew) in one's heart. The verse in Obadiah (1:12) another verse Proverbs 24:17–18) also says that you may not be joyous when your enemy is defeated, lest God get angry. This concept, of not being happy when an enemy falls, is codified in the Mishnah by Shmuel Hakatan (Avot 4:19). The idea of hatred was so distasteful to the Jew that the Talmud records that the Second Temple was destroyed because of unfounded hatred among Jews even though they performed mitzvot and were kind (Yoma 9b). Furthermore, it says in that passage that since we know that the first Temple was destroyed because Jews committed the three cardinal sins of Judaism--adultery, murder, and idolatry (the only three of the 613 for which one must choose death rather than perform them at gunpoint).... [t]his teaches us that for him who hates needlessly it is as if he has committed all three cardinal sins combined! The essence of Judaism itself involves the avoidance of hatred. When Hillel was asked by the non-Jew to tell him the entire Torah while standing on one foot (Shabbat 30a), Hillel replied that you should not do unto others what is hateful to you.... Thus, the essence of Judaism, according to Hillel, is to not act in a hateful manner.

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