LEV598 … one should not judge the piety of a deed by the initial impression it makes. Rather, one must appraise, as far as his intelligence will permit, the overall implications until he is able to objectively assess what will serve him better – doing [the deed] or not doing [it]. [For example,] the Torah has commanded us [this verse]: "Continually reprove your fellow man." So on numerous occasions one undertakes to rebuke sinners at a place or time where his words will not be accepted, thereby causing them to press onward with their wickedness and to desecrate the name [of the Eternal], adding rebellion to the sins [already committed]. Acting in such a manner is not piety, and one should rather be silent, as our Sages of blessed memory have said (Yevamos 65b): "Just as it is a mitzvah to say what will be heard, it is also a mitzvah not to say what will not be heard." [Likewise,] it is obvious that a person ought to run to fulfill a mitzvah and try to be among those who occupy themselves with its performance. But there are times when this may lead to disputes, and then a mitzvah will be debased and the name of Heaven will be desecrated more than it will be honored. Under such circumstances, it is surely incumbent upon the pious person to forgo the performance of the mitzvah rather than to pursue it.

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LEV612 The law of love imposes a responsibility upon the Jew not only for his fellow's material well-being but also for his religious development. Should you observe your neighbor doing something wrong you are commanded to rebuke him. However, the utmost caution must be used not to cause him any shame or embarrassment: "… Thou shall not hate thy brother in the heart; thou shall surely rebuke thy neighbor and not incur any sin because of him"; i.e., do not incur any sin in the process of rebuking him. [Torat Kohanim on this verse].

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LEV616 Up to which point must one reprove? Rav said: Until he is smitten for reproving (Erchin 16b)

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LEV605 R. Ila'a said in the name of R. Elazar b. R. Shimon: Just as it is a mitzvah to say what will be heeded, so it is a mitzvah not to say what will not be heeded [it being written: "Reprove, reprove" -- reprove him who accepts reproof] (Yevamoth 65b, see Rashi).

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LEV608 See [[GEN1104]] Genesis 20:17 prayed TZADIK 133-5

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LEV600 [Among the fundamentals of repentance]: Turning as many as possible away from transgression, as it is written (Yechezkel 18:30): "Return and turn others from all your offenses." We are hereby taught that this is one of the principles of repentance. And it is written [this verse]: "You shall surely rebuke your fellow man, and not bear sin because of him." This teaches us that if one does not reprove the other he is punished for his sins. And David said, likewise (Tehillim 51:15): "I will teach offenders Your ways and sinners will return to You."

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LEV610 The angry man will not be very wise, for anger drives wisdom from one's heart, so that he will not be able to answer correctly or to reprove correctly, and none of his words will be reasonable. The angry man hardens himself to reproof and chastisement, for no one is allowed to reveal to him his mistakes and his ugly ways. Everyone is afraid to speak to him of his affairs lest he arouse his anger. And even if someone does offer him reproof, he will reject it in anger. In sum, the angry man will not accept any good trait if he does not remove anger from his heart. And just as the angry man cannot accept chastisement from others, so he cannot administer it to them, for the Torah has written [this verse]: "Reprove, reprove your friend and do not bear sin because of him." In the beginning, reprove him gently and in private, telling him softly and ingratiatingly that you are speaking to him for his benefit. If you do so, you will not bear sin because of him. But if you rebuke him in the beginning in a loud, angry voice, and you shame him, then you will bear sin because of him, and that friend will not accept reproof from you. For this is the way of men. When one man bears down strongly on another, the latter stiffens and stands up against him and does not submit. About this Shelomo has said (Koheles 9:17): "The words of the wise, uttered gently, are accepted." We are familiar with the instance of Hillel and Shammai, about whom the three converts said (Shabbos 31a): "The unyieldingness of Shammai was like to drive us out of the world, and the humility of Hillel brought us under the wings of the Shechinah." Hillel, because of his great humility, could not be brought to anger, for one who keeps himself from anger acquires the trait of humility and of mercy. For cruelty proceeds from anger, as it is written (Shemos 22:23): "And I will be angry, and I will kill you with the sword" and accordingly anger is always found in conjunction with revenge, as in (Devarim 11:17): "And the anger of Hashem will burn against you, and he will close up the heavens." (Continued at [[LEV95]] Leviticus 10:16 angry TZADIK 241-3).

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LEV620 It is a negative commandment not to shame one's fellow-man as Scripture says, and you shall not bear sin because of him [this verse]; and all the more certainly so in public. It is a great wrong; the Sages of blessed memory said (Talmud Bavli, Baba M'tzi'a 59a): Whoever shames his fellow-man in public has no share in the world-to-come. We must therefore take care not to disgrace anyone, be he of low or high stature. Nor should we call him by any name of which he is ashamed. This applies, however, specifically to a matter between one man and his fellow-man. In matters of Heaven, though, if a person [sinned and he] did not repent when he was rebuked in private, he is to be shamed publicly, and his sin is to be made known in public, until he returns to the good path.

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LEV617 Do not cause shame to your fellow Jew. People cannot bear embarrassment. There is no greater type of suffering, so Hashem forbids us to embarrass our fellow Jews. When a Jew sins, one must rebuke him privately, not in public, so that he will not suffer undue embarrassment.... This is so when he has wronged his fellow Jew. On the other hand, if he has sinned against Hashem—i.e., his wrong is only between him and his Maker--if he does not heed rebuke that is given to him in private, it is a mitzvah to rebuke him in public and thereby cause him embarrassment. One continues to rebuke him and publicize his sin, until he is overcome by shame and repents.

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LEV618 However, if one realizes that the person who sinned is a deliberate scoffer who hates those who reproach him--as it says: אַל־תֹּ֣וכַח לֵ֭ץ פֶּן־יִשְׂנָאֶ֑ךָּ, “Do not rebuke a scoffer, lest he hate you” (Mishlei 9:8)--and he knows his rebuke will definitely have no effect on the person, the halakhah is different. Since people like these are likely to repeat their wrongdoings, it is possible that this person may sin again. Therefore, it is preferable to inform the dayanim of the city of the incident so that they can reprimand him for his sin and prevent him from transgressing in the future. This halachah would seem to apply to informing the sinner’s relatives, as well, if their words will have an influence on the sinner. However, the speaker’s intent in conveying the information must be entirely l’shem Shamayim, to uphold Hashem’s honor, and must not stem from hatred that he harbors toward the sinner for other reasons. Likewise, those who reprimand the sinner should make sure to do so discreetly and not embarrass him publicly, as it says הֹוכֵ֤חַ תֹּוכִ֙יחַ֙ אֶת־עֲמִיתֶ֔ךָ וְלֹא־תִשָּׂ֥א עָלָ֖יו חֵֽטְא׃, “You shall surely rebuke your fellow, but do not bear a sin because of him [by shaming him]" (Vayikra 19:17). All this applies only if two people saw the transgression. However, if there was only one witness, he should not testify in beis din about the person’s wrongdoing. In such a case, his testimony is pointless, for beis din cannot rely on what he says, as it says: לֹֽא־יָקוּם֩ עֵ֨ד אֶחָ֜ד בְּאִ֗ישׁ לְכָל־עָוֹן֙ וּלְכָל־חַטָּ֔את “A single witness shall not testify about a person regarding any sin or wrongdoing” (Devarim 19:15). Therefore, if he does testify about the other person, he will be labeled a motzi shem ra (slanderer). Our Sages said that one who testifies as a single witness about his fellow who has sinned [is subject to the punishment of lashes on a Rabbinical level]. Moreover, as all say (Pesachim 113b) that there are three people whom Hashem hates, one of whom is someone who sees his fellow commit an immoral act and testifies as a single witness against him. One may, however, inform his own rebbe or confidant about the matter privately if he knows that the rebbe or confident will believe him as though he heard the information from two people. It is then permissible for the rebbe to hate the offender and refrain from associating with him until he learns that the person mended his wrongful ways. Nevertheless, it is forbidden for the rebbe to inform others about the matter, just as it would be forbidden for him to inform others of what he saw had he witnessed the incident himself, as we explained in halakhah four.

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