NUM113 One should act kindly toward other people and speak well of them, judge them favorably, not malign them, and forgive them for speaking ill of him and disparaging him--even if they do not deserve it, as it says: “Do not curse the king, even in your thoughts” (Koheles 10:20); “Your mouth you release for evil, and your tongue you cleave to deceit. You sit and slander your brother; you malign the son of your mother” (Tehillim 50:19-20). An example of forgiving slander and disparagement is found in Scripture. It says, “Miriam and Aharon spoke against Moshe” (Bemidbar 12:1); then it says, “Now Moshe was an exceedingly humble man” (ibid. 12:3)--because he forgave them! Furthermore, the Wise One said, “Pay no attention to the words they speak....For you know in your heart that, many a time, you too have ridiculed others” (Koheles 7: 21-22). Our sages, of blessed memory, said, “It once happened that R. Eliezer stepped down before the ark and offered twenty-four supplications, and was not answered. R. Akiva then went down and said, ‘Our Father, our King...,’ and was answered. A Heavenly voice proclaimed, ‘It is not that this one is greater than the other, but only that this one is forbearing, while the other is not’” See Ta’anis 25b). One of the pious, it is told, passed by the carcass of a dog, which gave forth a dreadful odor. His disciples said to him, “How dreadfully does this carcass smell!” He said to them, “How white are its teeth!” They then regretted the disparaging remark they had made about it. Now if it is blameworthy to speak ill of a dead dog, how much more so is it blameworthy to speak ill of a living human being. And if it is proper to praise a dog’s carcass for the whiteness of its teeth, it is certainly a duty, then, to praise an intelligent and insightful human being. The pious one’s intention was to chastise his students, that they not accustom themselves to speaking evil, lest it become part of their nature. So too, if they trained themselves to speak favorably of others, this would become second nature to them. As it says: “He did not accustom his tongue to slander” (Tehillim 15:3), and conversely, “Your tongue thinks of injuring, like a sharpened razor that works deceit.... You love all injurious words” (ibid. 52:4, 6); and it says further: “A treacherous tongue-- what will it give you, what will it add to you? [A warrior’s sharpened arrows with hot coals of broom]” (ibid. 120: 3); “The words of a wise man's mouth are pleasant, but the lips of a fool devour him” (Koheles 10:12).

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NUM107 … humility does not entail becoming oblivious to one's own achievements and capabilities. It simply means that however superior to others one might be in certain ways, there is no justification for pride on that account. There is no reason for over emphasizing one's importance or for lording over others because of one's achievements. (Menachem Nahum of Chernobyl, Yismah Lev in his Me'or Einayim (Jerusalem: Me'or Einayim, 1966), pp. 353-354. See the English translation in Louis Jacobs, Hasidic Thought (New York: Behrman House, 1976), pp. 92-93)). Furthermore, a candid appraisal of one's superior abilities, when compared to others, should also entail an exercise in rigorous self-scrutiny regarding one's insufficiencies when compared to the achievements of others. In other words, humility is not the enemy of self-esteem, but of pride. (See Bahya Ibn Pakudah's notion that there are good and bad varieties of pride and that self-esteem necessary for spiritual development is a good form of pride. Bahya, Sefer Hovot ha-Levavot, p. 324.) Rather than condemning a person to a life of obscurity, humility can serve as a catalyst for the highest human accomplishments. In Jewish tradition, greatness and humility are not incompatible; rather they complement each other. Moses, considered by Jewish tradition to be the greatest Jew of all, is described by Scripture as the most humble of persons (this verse). According to the Talmud, God is great precisely because He is humble. Megillah 31a.

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NUM118 See [[GEN1048]] Genesis 18:27 dust LEHRMAN 255-6

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NUM111 In traditional Jewish understanding, humility has nothing to do with being the lowest, most debased, shrinking creature on earth.… Mussar teaches that real humility is always associated with healthy self-esteem. Lack of self-esteem leads to unholy and false feelings of worthlessness. … Being humble doesn't mean being a nobody, it just means being no more of a somebody than you ought to be. After all, Moses, who is considered the greatest of the prophets, is described in the Torah as "very humble, more than any other men who were upon the face of the earth" [this verse]. If a leader as great as Moses was so humble, there is surely more to humility than the shrinking meekness we ordinarily associate with the term.

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NUM114 One who speaks lashon hara transgresses the positive commandment of זָכֹ֕ור אֵ֧ת אֲשֶׁר־עָשָׂ֛ה יְהוָ֥ה אֱלֹהֶ֖יךָ לְמִרְיָ֑ם בַּדֶּ֖רֶךְ, “Remember what Hashem, your G-d, did to Miriam on the way" (Devarim 24:9). With this commandment, the Torah instructs us to constantly recall, verbally, the severe punishment that Hashem brought upon the righteous prophetess Miriam for speaking about Moshe. Miriam spoke only about her brother, whom she loved as herself, and whom she helped to raise as a child; she even risked her life to save him from the water. When she spoke about him, she did not denigrate him, but merely equated him to other prophets. Furthermore, she did not embarrass him by speaking in his presence, nor did she speak about him publicly. Rather, she spoke about him to her holy brother Aharon, in private. Moshe was not even offended by anything she said, as the pasuk states: והאיש משה ענו מאד, “And the man, Moshe, was very humble" (Bamidbar 12:3). Nevertheless, all of her good deeds did not help her, and she was still punished with tzaraas for what she did. If so, those foolish individuals who constantly relate terrible lashon hara about others will certainly be punished severely.

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NUM109 He [Hillel] used to say… In a place where there are no men, strive to be a man. Pirkei Avot, Perek II, mishnah 6. By this dictum Hillel qualifies his earlier teaching, "Do not separate yourself from the community." If a community is organized on the principles of Torah and recognizes its supreme authority, by all means, "do not separate": Work with it and give it your best. But what of a group that "goes after the desires of its heart"? What do you do when "the crowd" decides to visit a gambling haunt or some vile "place of pleasure"? Do we still say, "Do not separate"? No, concludes Hillel; sometimes the situation calls for a man, for the individual who will stand up to the group, who will say no! There are times when you must resist, go against the tide, be a non-conformist. Even if no one else has the wisdom or courage to be that man, even if everyone else has become part of the faceless crowd, the 1000-headed monster that is the spineless creature of conformity, you, the observant Jew, are the son of Abraham, he was called the 'ivri, because he stood on one side ('ever) of a great religious battle for the recognition of the Almighty, while the whole world stood arrayed against him on the other side. You must strive to be that man, standing on your own two feet. Bear this in mind: If the Jewish people had always gone along with the majority, there would be no Jewry and no Israel today. Yes, says Hillel, do not separate yourself from the group. But when that group has forfeited the right to be called "men," when righteousness and justice and Torah have departed--in the place where there is no man, you must stand up and fight the majority; you must be the man. Hillel was one of the most humble and patient people of his time (T.B. Shabbath 30b-31a). Yet, when the hour called for it, he allowed the community of Jerusalem to appoint him, an immigrant from Babylonia, as their nasi, their head, rather than any of their own leaders (T.B. Pesahim 66a). Can we reconcile such action with humility? I believe we can. To be humble does not mean that you refuse to appraise yourself realistically; neither does it require you to reject responsibilities, refuse to assume office, or rule out positions of leadership. Moses was the most humble of all men on the face of the earth, as Scripture attests [this verse]. Yet he led, rebuked and exerted his people; and surely he must have been aware of his historic significance. As we face up to our weaknesses, so should we honestly appraise our strengths and capacities. The humble person is not one who disparages his abilities and sees himself and others about his true talents. He is rather someone who accepts his talents and abilities, faces his historic opportunities, accepts his responsibilities. But he adds in utter honesty, "All this has been given me by the Almighty to serve Him and fulfill some small part of His plans for the universe. All this is no cause for arrogance or conceit. I am what the Creator has made me, and I must do what my situation demands of me." Where there is no man, strive to be a man.

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NUM115 R. Me'ir said: Whoever occupies himself with the study of Torah for its own sake merits many things; and not only that, but the entire world is worthwhile because of him. … He becomes modest, forbearing, and forgiving of insult … Pirkei Avot, Perek VI, mishnah 1. By its nature, the spirit that permeates the Torah must make a man humble and patient. The more he understands of its limitless depths and the infinite greatness of the Almighty, the more insignificant and humble must he become in his own eyes. Consider this passage from a 16th-century work: "… the Holy, Blessed One is an insulted sovereign who suffers humiliation far beyond human imagination. For certainly nothing is hidden from His watchful vision; and there is never a moment when a man is not nourished and maintained by the supernal energy which flows to him. Then never did a man sin toward Him at a time when He was not providing for the man's existence and ability to function. And still, though the man sins with that energy [from the Divine realm], He does not restrain him at all but bears the insult… and yet supplies energy and grants the man His favor…" (Second paragraph in Tomar D'vorah by R. Moses Cordovero (1522-1570), pupil of R. Joseph Karo and R. Solomon Alkabetz, who lived in Safed, where he taught kabbalah.) So will the Torah scholar reflect, "If the Almighty is tolerant and patient with my shortcomings and inadequacies, can I be different with others? And he will consider, with the Torah's insights, "If human conceit is a miserable sham, why grow angry if insulted?" If he is stirred to anger, the Torah will have taught him to rule over his destructive emotions. Moses, who is closest to the Torah, was "very humble, more than all men that were on the face of the earth" [this verse].

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NUM110 Humility also leads us to become more tolerant and accepting. Rashi, Judaism's most important biblical and talmudic commentator, identifies tolerance, along with modesty, as the defining characteristic of humility (see his commentary on this verse). Thus, precisely because Hillel and his disciples were not certain that they were entirely in the right, they tolerated opposing views, realizing that, though these views might be wrong in their conclusions, they might learn something from them. Therefore, a humble person bears no ill will toward those who disagree with him. Such an individual is aware that people have the right to understand the world differently, and that their perceptions might have something to teach him.

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NUM112 Low self-esteem can also make us unreasonably fearful. The Bible tells how Moses sent twelve tribal representatives to spy out the land of Israel. They were probably people of good intentions, or Moses would not have sent them, but because the spies had a poor self-image, they panicked when they came upon the inhabitants of Canaan: "We look like grasshoppers to ourselves, and so we must have looked to them" (Numbers 13:33). Thus, when they came back, they advised the Israelites to give up hope of ever living in Canaan. Contrast their behavior with that of Moses, who, although he was the humblest man of his time [this verse], was unintimidated by Pharaoh.

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NUM116 Ridiculing or denigrating others for not conforming to our vision of how people should behave reinforces the gossip's sense of superiority. Thus, a gossip is rarely humble. And humility, as we know from the Torah's description of Moses [this verse], is an important quality to possess.

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