GEN1461 Rabban Gamaliel, the son of Rabbi Judah haNasik said; It is seemly to combine the study of Torah with an occupation, for the wearying labor of both keeps sin forgotten. All Torah study that does not have work accompanying it must in the end come to nothing and bring sin in its wake. Let all who work for the community, the people, work with them for the sake of Heaven, for the merit of their fathers sustains them, and their righteousness will endure forever. And as for your, I [the Almighty] will account you worthy of great reward, as if you had done [everything]. Pirkei Avot II:2   Why are there people who sin? Why do so man others have recourse to psychiatrists? In far too many instances, it is simply because their minds are empty of any sense of purpose and responsibility. Without any stabilizing center of purpose, duty, obligation around which to organize their lives, these unfortunates become distraught. But if you immerse yourself in this two-fold program of Torah and derech eretz, Torah study and productive achievement in the secular realm, you will find so much of a meaningful nature to do, that there will be no time to even think of sin. On the other hand, a human spirit that finds no outlets for its energies in Torah, in religious study and observance, is like a “body of water that is blocked: it turns back upon itself, collecting scum, refuse and silt.” As the Sages say, “He who abandons the words of Torah will have no strength to withstand a day of tribulation.” Talmud Berakoth 63a. When his brothers threw Joseph into the pit, the Torah tells us, “The pit was empty; there was no water in it.” [this verse] If it was empty, obviously there was no water in it! Surely the second part is superfluous? The Talmud therefore interprets it to denote that “water there was not in it, but there were snakes and scorpions.” Shabbat 22a, Hagigah 3a.   A profound thought is suggested to us here. When a pit is empty, it fills up with serpents. When a mind is empty, it becomes a snakepit. Nature abhors a vacuum. If there is one, the least desirable of nature’s creatures rush to occupy it. The stomach cannot feed on its own gastric juices, nor can the mind function on its own psychic phantoms. The human entity must be given a sense of purpose and values from without. The prisoner cannot liberate himself from his dungeon. Talmud Berakoth 5b.   When sound, Heaven-blessed values are dethroned, a petty passion climbs to power. SINAI1 133-4

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GEN1463 One’s family is called “near of his flesh.” Leviticus 18:6.   Here [we see that] a man leaves the “nearness” of his parents and his relatives, and sees that his wife is closer to him than are they.   HTBAJ 173

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GEN1464 Everyone needs to repent, for we all do wrongful acts sometimes.   As the Bible teaches, “There is not one righteous person on earth who does only good and never sins” Ecclesiastes 7:20. The Bible underscores this by describing transgressions and even crimes committed by its greatest figures, e.g. Judah arranges to sell his brother Joseph into slavery.  TELVOL 1:150

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GEN1465 See [[GEN1242]] Genesis 27:18 went TELVOL1 401-2

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GEN1466 J contains some rather elaborate deceptions which are not fully paralleled in [either] E and there is little or no mention of these events in P. In particular, the deception of Jacob by his sons concerning Joseph’s appearance contains the following language in Genesis 37:31 – 32: “And they took Joseph’s coat, and killed a he goat and dipped the coat in blood; and they sent the coat of many colors, and they brought it to their father; and they said: ‘This we have found. Discern please whether it is your son’s coat or not?’” There is no mention of this deception in E. Chapter 38 demonstrates the characteristic J style of countering deception with deception. Here again, one finds J showing that one deception is punishable by another deception using similar language. In this case, Judith fears that Tamar will cause the death of his only remaining son Shelah and tries to deceive Tamar by telling her (38:11): “Remain a widow in your father’s house, till Shelah my son grows up,” But then the text tells us it is a deception “… for he feared that he would die, like his brothers.” Tamar then deceives Judah into fathering a child for her and before she gets punished she turns to Judah and states (38:25): “Discern please who is these are, the signet and the cord and the staff.” The text then adds (38:26): “She is more righteous than I come inasmuch as I did not give her to my son Shelah.” Clearly demonstrating again, that deceptions involving sexual promiscuity are not seen as inherently without merit and that deception is usually punishable by another deception.

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GEN1467 Jacob is the Bible’s most prominent example of a parent who could not be consoled.   … Though we can all understand unending grief, particularly after the death of a child, the Shulchan Arukh law rules that a person “should not grieve too much for the dead, and whoever grieves excessively is really grieving for someone else.   [The ArtScroll translation and commentary understands this Talmudic passage as being more in the nature of a curse than of a psychological observation and renders it as follows: “Anyone who grieves over his dead to excess will ultimately weep for another dead.” The commentary explains this teaching (in line with a statement of Rashi) as meaning that “whoever chooses to wallow in grief will be paid with further grief.”] The Torah has set limits for every stage of grief, and we may not add to them. Yoreh Deah 394:1, based on Mo’ed Kattan 27b.   TELVOL 2:131-2

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GEN1468 [This] type[] of conduct constitute[s] gemiluth chesed [acts of lovingkindness], to keep the other person in mind for the purpose of doing good to him, and praise him to those having the power to help him.   AHAVCH 24

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GEN1469 Judaism has established a rigid code of rituals for the guidance of mourners. It prescribes the conduct which tradition regards as proper and respectful in the period of bereavement. These rules are particularly instructive for the maintenance of an atmosphere of dignified solemnity in a house of mourning where there is little grief. A death which terminates a prolonged agonizing sickness is understandably accepted by the surviving kin with a muted sense of relief.   The same is true of a death which lifts a crushing physical and financial burden from the family of the deceased. Yet, even under such circumstances, the observance of mourning rituals is important as an expression of honor for the memory of the decedent.   The duty of the bereaved kin to mourn their loss has as its counterpart of duty of friends to offer condolences. This obligation similarly srerves a double purpose. It brings solace to the mourners. It also gives the friends an opportunity for paying tribute to the memory of the departed.  The latter aspect of condolence visitations was stressed by Rabbi Judah (3rd cent.). The Talmud relates the story of a man who died without heirs. Hence there were no mourners in need of consolation.  Yet Rabbi Judah was troubled because the decedent was denied the honor which comforters would have paid to his memory had they had the opportunity to make a condolence visit. He therefore assembled a quorum of men to sit with him in the house of the departed to receive condolence visitations. Shabbat 152b The practice of offering condolences is as ancient as the custom of mourning. When Jacob mourned Joseph, “All this sons and all the daughters rose up to comfort him” [this verse]. Ecclesiastes acclaimed the virtue of condolence visits: “It is better to go the house of mourning than to the house of feasting” Eccles. 7:2  How should a vistor behave in a house of mourning? According to the rabbis, a visitor should sit in silence Berachot 6b, Moed Katan 28b The ancient sages apparently felt that a mourner engrossed in his grief is in no mood for conversation. They were also undoubtedly aware of the fact that unsophisticated people might say something which would bruise painfully raw nerves. In their opinion, a visit, even if no words are spoken, is in itself a gesture of sympathy which will bring comfort to the bereaved. The silence was always broken before leaving, when visitors recite the traditional message of condolence.   The maintenance of silence by visitors was an acceptable practice in ancient times because all mourners understood the significance of the silence. Modern people, not familiar with this practice, might misinterpret such silence as assign of indifference. Visitors therefore feel constrained to express some sentiments that will ease the pain of the mourners. Unfortunately, the wisdom for choosing the right words at such a delicate moment eludes many people.  The injection of humor in a house of mourning is highly improper. In the words of the rabbis: “Let no one smile in the company of mourners, nor grieve in the company of celebrators” Derech Eretz Rabbah 7.   The practice of serving refreshments and drinks to visitors is also objectionable because it turns the atmosphere of solemnity into conviviality. Such a disregard of propriety is a mockery of the dead.   There are visitors who try to distract the mourner by taking his mind off his loss. That is a misguided strategy. Mourners need sympathy, not distraction. It is also a disservice to the memory of the dead. Comments on the merits of the deceased and an expression of a sense of personal loss are always proper and comforting to the bereaved. BLOCH 233-5

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GEN1470 If we refrain from legitimately rebuking someone, he will eventually be angry at us.   Rashi explains that Yehuda left his brothers because of the selling of Yosef.   Yehuda’s brothers removed him from his rank as leader when they saw the grief of their father over the loss of Yosef. They said to Yehuda, “You said to sell him.   Had you said to return him, we would have listed to you.”   Rabbi Yeruchom Levovitz notes that at first Yosef’s brothers wanted to kill him and in the end because of Yehuda’s advice they sold sold him.   Even though Yehuda saved them from committing a more heinous crime, they were angry at him for allowing them to sell Yosef.  This behavior is typical of someone who regrets his crime after having committed it; he reproaches others for not having prevented him.   … There always comes a time, said the Chofetz Chayim, when a person who has done wrong has grievances against others for failing to stop him; if not in this world, then in the world to come.   (Daas Torah: Limuday Mussray Hatorah, vol. 1, pp. 224-225). PLYN 110-1

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GEN1471 R. Elazar said: If someone does a mitzvah and does not finish it, and someone else comes and finishes it, he [the first] is brought down from his greatness, As it is written: ‘And it was at that time that Judah ‘went down from his brothers [having initiated Joseph’s rescue, but not having consummated it]’ Sotah 13b TEMIMAH-GEN 158

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