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EXODUS — 21:8 redeemed

EXOD527 Observe the laws of marrying a Hebrew maidservant. If the father of a Jewish girl is so poor that he sells her as a maidservant, Hashem shows great mercy on the girl and her father. He commands the buyer to marry the girl so that she does not remain a maidservant. Alternatively, the buyer must give the maidservant to his son in marriage. Otherwise, before she finishes her term of labor under the buyer’s care, he must help her to return to her father's house by allowing her redemption. All of these laws reflect the Holy One’s kindness towards His works and His great concern for unfortunate individuals.

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EXODUS — 21:8 redemption

EXOD529 Observe the laws of marrying a Hebrew maidservant. If a Jew acquires a Hebrew maidservant, he has a mitzvah to help her to return to the house of her father. He helps by cooperating when she, her father or some other member of her family comes to redeem her. On the basis of the original expected term of service and knowing the price that he paid her father for her, he calculates the worth of each year's work. Knowing the length of time that she had worked for him, he subtracts the worth of that time from the price that he paid for her and accepts the difference as the price of her redemption. He may not demand that she continue to work for him for the full term of the original transaction. Neither may he demand a higher redemption price in an attempt to profit as she goes free from him. Either type of behavior would show that he has an evil heart. Jews are expected to behave with mercy, dignity and refinement, so it is fitting for them to show kindness, especially towards their workers, even if the term of service had been only one day.

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EXODUS — 21:10 conjugal

EXOD535 The obligation of the husband to provide physical pleasure for his wife through the act of sexual union is one part of the general obligations of every Jewish husband to his wife, to procreate and have children. Therefore, refusal to have sexual relations with his wife makes the man into a sinner, according to the Talmud, Yevamot 62b and it is grounds for divorce if either the man Maimonides, Hilchot Ishut 14:5 or the woman 14:8 refuses to have sex on a regular basis. This obligation exists even if the couple has already fulfilled the obligation to procreate, thus demonstrating that the sexual act, in and of itself, has positive value in Judaism.

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EXODUS — 21:10 conjugal

EXOD533 Most other traditions in both the Occident and the Orient--and in American law as well, until recently--assume that men have sexual drives and women do not, but women acquiesce to the sexual advances of their husbands because they want economic security and children. Judaism, by contrast, from its earliest sources, assumes that women have sexual needs just as much as men do. [This verse] stipulates that even a man who marries a slave "must not withhold from her her food, clothing, or conjugal rights," and the Rabbis reasoned that this holds even more obviously for a man marrying a free woman. Thus, while a husband may never force himself upon his wife, the Mishnah stipulates the number of times each week he must offer to have sexual relations with her, which depends on how often his job enables him to be home. Conversely, he has rights to sex within marriage, too, and if his wife consistently refuses to have sex with him, he may gradually reduce the amount of money he has to pay her in the divorce settlement until he does not have to pay her anything. M. Ketubbot 5:6-7

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EXODUS — 21:10 conjugal

EXOD534 The Jewish tradition sees two primary purposes for sex within marriage, as evidenced by the two commands in the Torah to engage in sExodus One appears in Exodus 21, where the Torah says, at least as the Talmud understood it, that a man taking a woman in marriage may not deprive her of "her food, clothing, or conjugal rights" [this verse]. The other appears in the very first chapter of Genesis, in which God tells the first man and woman to "be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth." Genesis 1:28 Thus companionship and procreation are the two divinely ordained purposes of sex within marriage. Moreover, these are independent commandments. Thus before, during, and after the years that a couple plans to have children, the duty to have conjugal relations for the sake of companionship continues. God's desire, according to the Torah and the Talmud is that people should, if at all possible, live in marital partnership, regardless of their ability to procreate. [B. Yevamot 61b, where Rabbi Nahman, quoting Genesis 2:18, assets that "although a man may have many children, he must not remain without a wife, for the Torah says, 'It is not good that a man should be alone.'" Later Jewish law codes take this as authoritative law; see M.T. Laws of Marriage 15:16; Laws of Forbidden Intercourse 21:26; and S.A. Even Ha'ezer 1:8].

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EXODUS — 21:10 conjugal

EXOD532 In a Jewish marriage, over and above the question procreation, there exists the conjugal rights of the wife, technically termed onah. Thus, non-procreative intercourse such as occurs if the wife is too young to bear children, or is barren, or is pregnant, or post- menopausal, or following a hysterectomy, is not only allowed but required. Improper emission of seed (hashhatat zara) is not involved or is canceled out so long as the intercourse is in the manner of procreation. Not only are such sexual activities permitted, but they are in fact required by Biblical law based on [this verse]. "Marriage and marital relations are both independent of procreation, achieving the many desiderata spoken of in Talmudic, responsa, and mystic literatures." (Feldman, D. Birth Control in Jewish Law, 1968, New York Univ. Press, 322 pp.) Such goals include fulfilling the wife's desire, physical release of the husband's sexual pressures, and the maintenance of marital harmony and domestic peace. A lengthy chapter in Feldman's book is devoted to a discussion of the legitimacy of sexual pleasure in Judaism. He quotes Nahmanidies who said that "Sexual intercourse is holy and pure when carried on properly, in the proper time and with the proper intentions. No one should claim that it is ugly or unseemly. God forbid! ..." In a similar vein, Rabbi Jacob Emden is cited as having said: "... To us the sexual act is worthy, good and beneficial even to the soul. No other human activity compares with it; when performed with pure and clean intention it is certainly holy. There is nothing impure or defective about it, rather much exaltation..." Thus, whereas Christian teaching promulgates that procreation is the sole purpose of marriage and sexual intercourse, Judaism requires that not only need procreation result from sex, but mutual pleasure is sufficient reason for the sex act.

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