GEN1147 Question: One of the leading Torah authorities of the generation suffered the death of his son, and did not shed even a single tear over him.   Is this a positive attribute, or not?   Answer: This is indeed a negative attribute.  It is indicative of hard-heartedness, and an evil quality of the soul.   It is a trait of cruelty… Crying, mourning and shedding tears for the passing of relatives –let alone for the passing of a righteous individual – is characteristic of the prophets, the saintly and the pious.   Such behavior is indicative of the purity of one’s soul, and of his humility before the Creator.   He will then grieve over his sins, and mourn for his transgressions, which were a cause for this tragedy. [This is, the tragedy of a relative’s passing should lead one to rethink his own conduct and repent for his sins, in the belief that they contributed to the Divine decrees that took the life of this relative.] It was not without reason that our Sages taught (Mo’ed Katan 27b): “Three days [following a death] are for weeping; seven (Shiva) for mourning; thirty (Sheloshim) for [the prohibition of] ironing and haircuts.” Had weeping been considered unseemly, the rabbis would certainly not have instituted three days for this purpose.   So too, with regard to Avraham Avinu a”h, the Torah states [this verse] that he came “to eulogize Sarah, and to week for her.” We find similar examples with regard to Yaakov, King David, and countless others.   EYES 169