GEN481 The first step in learning how to restrain our [anger] is to acknowledge that we are able to control our temper and not be controlled by it.  That human beings have control over their anger is underscored by a statement God makes near the beginning of Genesis.  Aware of Cain’s fury at his brother Abel, the Lord says to him, [this verse].  Disregarding God’s words, Cain makes no effort to control his anger, and kills Abel, thus becoming the first murderer in history.  However, God’s words, “you can be its master,” remain as an admonition to all of us who are tempted to act cruelly or violently when angry.  A psychiatrist told me of a patient whose wife claimed that she was incapable of controlling her temper, and who used to scream hysterically at him and even slap him.  Yet she never expressed such anger in public.  The patient learned that when she was screaming at him in their car, if he opened the windows, she would immediately desist for fear of being overheard.  Her calmer behavior in public proved, of course, that she could control herself if she wanted to.  TELVOL 1:263