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GENESIS — 43:30 feeling

GEN1542 Mercy is an extremely noble trait. It is one of the thirteen traits attributed to the Holy One Blessed be He, as it is written Exodus 34:6: “Merciful and gracious.” All that one can do in cultivating this trait, he should exert himself to do.   Just as one would want to be pitied in his time of need, so should he pity others who are in need, as it is written Leviticus 19:18: “And you should love your fellowman as yourself.” The Creator, Blessed be He, dispensed of this trait to His righteous servants as a distinguishing characteristic, as we find with Yosef, whose “mercies were kindled” [this verse].  It befits the wise man that the trait of mercy and graciousness be implanted in his heart all of his days.  TZADIK 141

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GENESIS — 43:32 abhorrent

GEN1543 Historically the dietary laws (kashrut) have been a way of encouraging Jewish social intercourse and limiting interaction with non-Jews. Dietary rules create boundaries.  This is well illustrated when Joseph eats with his brothers before he reveals his true identify to them [this verse].   Kashrut has played a significant role in connecting Jews to one another and achieving a sense of common identity.  However, disputes about kashrut have created divisions within the Jewish community regarding the creation of boundary lines distinguishing one stream from another or one school of interpretation from the other.   Decisions about dietary restrictions are often grounded in the philosophy of a particular steam.  The best and clearest example comes from classical Reform Judaism and its 1885 Pittsburgh Platform with its thoroughgoing universalism and its rejection of bodily mitzvot.  In rejecting peoplehood, the rejection of kashrut makes complete sense.   Classical Reformers understood how important the dietary laws had been to the past formulations of Judaism and that the new Judaism they were creating required a radical change to symbolize the new philosophy: We hold that all such Mosaic and rabbinical laws as regulate diet, priestly purity, and dress originated in ages and under the influence of ideas entirely foreign to our present mental and spiritual state.   They fail to impress the modern Jew with a spirit of priestly holiness; their observance in our days is apt rather to obstruct than to further modern spiritual elevation.  If the goal was integration into society, kashrut was a barrier.   Meals played an important role in nineteenth-century social and business relationships, as they do today.   If the essence of religion is ethical behavior, then what goes into the mouth is not as important as what comes out of the mouth.   This Enlightenment-inspired Reform community wanted to assimilate into educated society and to emphasize ethical behavior.   That legacy shaped Reform Judaism.   Personally, I remember participating in youth group events where the food was deliberately not kasher as a way of emphasizing the ethical dimension of Judaism. (By Peter Knobel, “WHAT I EAT IS WHO I AM: Kashrut and Identity”) SACTAB 439-440 (Continued at [[LEV118]] Leviticus 11:44 holy SACTAB 440-2)

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GENESIS — 43:32 separately

GEN1544 Eating is a visceral experience. It not only sustains our bodies, but also leaves an imprint on our psyches. Eating is obviously a basic necessity to sustain life, yet eating is also deeply connected to identity. What we eat and what we refrain from eating says a great deal about who we are and how we understand ourselves in relation to other Jews and other human beings. In Torah we have clear regulations about which animals and fish may be consumed and which are prohibited (Leviticus 11, Deuteronomy 14). Historically the dietary laws (kashrut) have been a way of encouraging Jewish social intercourse and limiting interaction with non-Jews. Dietary rules create boundaries. This is well illustrated when Joseph eats with his brothers before he reveals his true identity to them. The text says [this verse]. Kashrut has played a significant role in connecting Jews to one another and achieving a sense of common identity. However, disputes about kashrut have created divisions within the Jewish community regarding the creation of boundary lines distinguishing one stream from another or one school of interpretation from the other. Decisions about dietary restrictions are often grounded in the philosophy of a particular stream. The best and clearest example comes from classical Reform Judaism and its 1885 Pittsburgh Platform with its thoroughgoing universalism and its rejection of bodily mitzvot. In rejecting peoplehood, the rejection of kashrut makes complete sense. Classical Reformers understood how important the dietary laws had been to the past formulations of Judaism and that the new Judaism they were creating required a radical change to symbolize the new philosophy: “We hold that all such Mosaic and Rabbinic laws as regulate diet, priestly purity, and dress originated in ages and under the influence of ideas entirely foreign to our present mental and spiritual state. They fail to impress the modern Jew with a spirit of priestly holiness; their observance in our days is apt rather to obstruct than to further modern spiritual elevation.” [“The Pittsburgh Platform,” 1885, www.ccarnet.org.] (By Peter Knobel, “What I Eat Is Who I Am: Kashrut and Identity”)

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GENESIS — 44:18 [me]

GEN1547 [Accusations should Fit the Person] Rabbi Bunam learned that he had been accused of a misdeed.  He turned to his Hasidim and said, “Usually accusations fit the person accused.   A lowly person is accused of a low crime, a distinguished man of a higher offense.   When Joseph’s brothers were accused of stealing the goblet, Judah exclaimed; “A person like me you accuse of stealing? [this verse begins Judah’s speech in Hebrew with the words bi, “me.”] I may say the same: of all possible accusations, they accuse me of a crime entirely unsuited to my character!”   Sayings of the Hasidic Rebbes   GOODSOC 74

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GENESIS — 44:18 impatient

GEN1548 When dealing with an enraged person, particularly someone angry with us, we should act as calmly as we can.  [Proverbs 15:1] teaches that calmness can be contagious: “A gentle response pacifies wrath.”   It is hard for someone to continue to shout if we respond gently and in an unruffled way.   If we respond to shouting and accusations with more shouting and accusations, the conflict is far more likely to escalate.   If someone has reason to be upset with us, we should acknowledge that fact, and ask for mercy.   Thus [this verse].  Rabbi Zelig Pliskin comments, “When you think that what you say will be irritating to the person you are talking to, you can defuse his potential anger by mentioning right at the start that you hope that what you say will not get [him] angry.”   Most people think of themselves as fair and generous.  If we acknowledge their right to be upset, but appeal to them to restrain their anger, they are more likely to be disarmed.   But, if we challenge or even deny the other party’s right to be upset, we will probably trigger another angry reaction.   TELVOL1:257

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GENESIS — 44:18 please

GEN1549 Many [medical] patients ask for medication seeking perfect lives, free of physical or mental pain or blemishes.  Is this appropriate? Is there a value in suffering?   In general, Judaism does not extol the virtues of suffering.   However, in the stories of the patriarchs we certainly see examples of emotional growth that comes through hardship and pain, grief or disappointment.  Perhaps the clearest example is Judah.  His emotional growth following the death of two sons prepared him to speak eloquently and soulfully to Joseph as he pleaded for the release of his brother Benjamin.   Pain leads to growth. Judaism offers several models of this. Jewish laws of mourning are designed to help people cope naturally with life’s pain and emerge with stronger community and family bonds. Fasting is described as “afflicting one’s soul” (Numbers 29:7), and on Yom Kippur this is one way we try to get closer to God. The older I get, the more I can look back on painful experiences in my own life and see how profoundly they have positively shaped who I am today. The expression “what doesn't kill you will make you stronger” is very apt. Do medications that blunt emotions also blunt the emotional growth that should occur? I do not think there are answers to this question. Judaism sees everything in life, both the good and the bad, as coming from God. To me this implies that we should try to live through all of life's experiences as consciously as possible, without medications that numb us to the outside world. Judaism is all about balance. The pursuit is perfect, pain free lives is not the work for which we were created. It is to struggle, grow, appreciate the beauty of life, and-- in the process-- become closer to God. (By Robert S. Karasov)

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GENESIS — 44:30 bound

GEN1551 If one has a child, close friend or relative in another city and wishes to keep abreast of his affairs out of genuine love and concern for his well-being, then it is permitted to inquire of acquaintances living in that city, as long as it is made clear that one’s motives are positive.   Zera Chaim 4:11 In such a case, the person being questioned is allowed to answer truthfully, as long as his motives are beneficial as well. This also applies to a teacher who maintains a close connection with former students and wishes to keep informed of their progress, especially if he can help them in any way to develop in a positive direction or prevent them from straying. One of the sterling qualities of a righteous person is “to carry a burden with one’s friend.” A righteous person is genuinely happy in others’ rejoicing, and sad with their pitfalls and misfortunes. When such people hear negative news about another person they will not think less of them, but will be saddened by their pitfalls. Unfortunately, our hearts are not pure, and hearing about someone’s negative traits inadvertently involves some maligning of the person’s character and therefore is lashon hara. Nevertheless, some relationships can come very close to the ideal. The Torah describes Yaakov’s inner connection with his son Binyamin: His soul is attached to his soul [this verse]. Similarly (I Shmuel 18:1), The soul of Yonasan was bound with the soul of David, for he loved him as himself.  In such cases the source of questioning about the welfare of that close person is purely to “rejoice in his well-being and to be saddened by his pitfall or misfortune,” with no trace of maligning character. A conversation in this spirit is not lashon hara. EHRMAN  207-8

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