LEV210 In Judaism, generosity, nedivut, is as much concerned with "how" as "how much." Thus, "R. Yohanan b. Zakkai told his five disciples to find the chief characteristic a person should cultivate. R. Eliezer said, 'A friendly eye.' R. Joshua said, 'A good friend.' R. Yose said, 'A good neighbor.' R. Simon said, 'Seeing the consequences of one's acts.' R. Elazar b. Arakh said 'A good heart.' R. Yohanan responded, 'I prefer Elazar's answer because it will lead to all the rest" (Avot 2:9). R. Yohanan understood that, with the proper intention, the correct "how," other positive behavior follows almost automatically. So too, the hasidic master Rabbi Menachem Mendel of Kotsk taught: "The Torah, speaking of God's commands, says, '… which you shall do, and live thereby' [this verse]. That means, perform them with liveliness and enthusiasm'" (Elkins, Melodies from My Father's House). From Yohanan b. Zakkai to the Kotzker Rebbe, our sages stressed the value of nedivut as referring to quality, not quantity, because rich Jews were such a tiny minority (though an important one) among us. Much of what they said also applies to us, a generation blessed with sufficient means to elevate shopping to a seriously pursued avocation. Our tradition instructs us to guard against such selfishness and greed, teaching us that sharing ourselves is every bit as important as sharing our funds. So Francie [co-author Frances Weinman Schwartz] remembers how "Jewish" a song from her NFTY camping days seemed: "Love is nothing till you give it away.…" Indeed, most of us have found ourselves fervently agreeing with the prayer of our Yiddish ancestors: "May God save me from the stingy of heart!"