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GENESIS — 18:13 I

GEN950 The Talmud Yevamot 65b says that a person may lie for the sake of peace …   What does this now mean? Is an adulterous husband now “permitted” to lie to his wife about his affair “for the sake of peace,” for example, so that his wife doesn’t divorce him? This principle can be extended to absurd limits.  What is this passage actually telling us? …   [Lengthy discussion]  while it might be technically and biblically permitted to tell half-truths in nonlegal situations, Judaism [cannot] permit this “loophole” to be used by the common person in an everyday situation. Everyone would take advantage of it and misuse it, much the same way that people lie today in American society … a Jew should always try to tell the truth, whether in a courtroom situation or a social situation, as we cannot hope to differentiate between a “permissible” lie and a “prohibited” lie.  AMEMEI 293-6

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GENESIS — 18:13 I

GEN951 We gain a good sense of just how dear peace was to the rabbis when we read some of their exaggerated statements they made to “prove” shalom’s importance. For example, they had Adonai compromise plans for our planet’s basic structure in order to keep peace among God’s creations. “When God created people, God said, ‘If I create them as part of the heavenly world, there will be one more creation in heaven than on earth and there will be no peace in the universe. But if I create them as part of the earthly world, there will also be imbalance and controversy. So if I am to have peace in the universe, I will have to create humanity as partaking of both the heavenly and the earthly worlds.’ And so God did” Genesis Rabbah 12:8 A second instance of rabbinic hyperbole: “R. Ishmael taught: Great is peace, for we are commanded to treat God’s name with the greatest sanctity.  Look what God did for the sake of peace. If a husband suspects his wife of adultery, the Torah says that he should bring her to the Temple. There, the sacred letters of the Torah, with God’s name among them, are written on paper and ‘washed’ into a cup. The accused adulteress must then drink this portion and is proven guilty if her body becomes swollen. God allows the blasphemy of having God’s Name blotted out in water so that all the innocent women may be restored to their households in peace” Numbers 5:16-29., Hashalom 9, the Chapter about Peace, attached to the Talmudic tractate Derekh Eretz Zuta, the “smaller” version of The Way of the World. God, say some of the braver rabbis, even fudged the truth so that people might live in peace. “R. Ishmael said: Great is peace. When Sarah is told she will bear a son, she laughs, saying, “Shall I, so withered, have the joy of a child, my husband being so old?’ But when the Torah relates that God asks Abraham why Sarah laughed, God diplomatically, though untruthfully, omits Sarah’s reference to Abraham’s age, all for the sake of peace [this and preceding verse]. Bava Kamma 87a “R. Simeon b. Gamaliel said: Great is peace, since an untrue statement is made in the Torah to maintain peace between Joseph and his brothers after Jacob had died, as it is written: ‘And they sent a message to Joseph saying: Before he died, your father commanded that you forgive your brothers for the sin they committed against you’ Genesis 50:16-17 But nowhere in the Torah do we find that Jacob had so charged him” Leviticus Rabah 9:9 Bar Kapara reports a similar subtlety after an angel visits Samson’s mother-to-be: “He said to her, ‘Behold, now you are barren … but you shall conceive and bear a son’ Judges 13:3.  When she repeats this to her husband, she only says, ‘Behold you shall conceive and bear a son’ 13:7, and there is no mention of her infertility” Perek Hashalom 7. Such statements caused R. Simeon b. Gamaliel to observe: “See how much ink was spilled, how many pens broken, how many hides cured, how many children spanked—to learn in the Torah something that had never been said. Great indeed, then, is the power of peace!” Tanhuma, Buber Ed., Tzav 10. Traditional Jewish teachings cites four major areas meriting peace that touch us all: family, neighbors, community, and the hereafter. We moderns have extended shalom to two additional themes: the world of politics and our personal, inward search for meaning. BOROJMV 238-40

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GENESIS — 18:13 I

GEN946 Great is peace, since for the sake of peace the Holy One altered a statement.   When He reported Sarah’s statement to Abraham, He quotes her as saying, “Indeed, shall I who am old bear a child?” [this verse], when in fact she had said, “My lord [Abraham] being old” Genesis 18:12.   Thus, to preserve domestic peace, God omitted Sarah’s slight upon her husband.   GOODSOC 225

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GENESIS — 18:13 I

GEN949 The Chaffetz Chayyim, Judaism’s foremost scholar on the laws of speech, rules that when a person ask you what another has said about him, and the statement was derogatory, then, “if one can formulate a reply which will not repeat the bad things which were said and will also not be an outright lie, one should reply in this way.  However, if one knows that one’s friend will not accept such a reply, then it is permitted to tell a complete lie, because of peace” Laws of Rechilut 1:8.   The Chaffetz Chayyim’s position is based on the Talmud’s teaching that, for the sake of peace, one can modify the truth, and on Maimonides’ ruling, “[A scholar] does not alter the truth in his speech, not adding or subtracting, except in the interest of peace and the like” Mishneh Torah, “Laws of Character Development” 5:7.   In English, we have the expression “to be brutally honest.”  If being honest means that you will have to be “brutal,” then you should reconsider your words.  TELVOL1:439

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GENESIS — 18:13 old

GEN952 In certain situations the Sages allowed an altering of the truth … For example, it is permitted, and indeed a mitzvah, to alter the truth to bring peace between two parties in a dispute, or between quarreling spouses. We find that even Hashem altered the truth in order to bring peace into a marriage. Rashi, Bereishis 18:13, and Talmud, Yevamos 65b.  The Sages also encourage us to follow the example of Aharon. When Aharon the Kohen would see that two people were fighting he would go to one sit with him, and say, “Your friend feels so bad, he is so embarrassed because he feels he is at fault …,” and would stay with him until his feelings of animosity would completely dissipate. Then Aharon would go to the antagonist and sit with him and say, “Your friend feels so bad, he is so embarrassed because he feels his is at fault…,” and would stay with him until his animosity would completely dissipate. Then the two would meet on the street and they would embrace. Pirkei Avos 1;12, Avos D’Rabbi Nosson 12:3 JOURNEY 94-5

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GENESIS — 18:13 old

GEN953 One should not repeat what one person said about another if he spoke in even slightly insulting terms. Chofetz Chaim, Hilchos Rechilus 8:4 In Parshas Vayeira Sarah said: “How can I have children and my husband is an old man?” Hashem repeated her words to Avraham in the following way: Sarah said, “How can I have children and I am old?” Hashem changed her version because a husband could be sensitive to being referred to as an old man, even though only slight feelings of hurt are involved. [this verse] JOURNEY 164

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